- Alan: I'm not gonna let you fix me up with one of your bimbo girlfriends.
- Charlie: OK, forget it.
- Alan: She'd have to be really pretty, like a... like a ten. And young, like a twenty.
- Charlie: Anything else?
- Alan: Uh, and smart. Uh, and a sense of humor's important. Uh, well-read, uh, good with kids, uh, non-smoking, of course... ooh, and, uh, easy on the piercings. Nothing south of the equator.
- Charlie: You're mighty picky for a guy with an adult newsstand in his sock drawer.
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